it's a wyld kind of life.

every other wednesday night i have about 75ish (that could be totally wrong, i'm really bad at estimating...) middle school kids come to my house for club. it's crazy, it's loud, it's fun, it's wydlife. we play strange games, sing songs, eat weird things, and for the last 15 minutes of each club one of the leaders gets to talk about real life aka jesus. it's a sweet time.

club is so much fun-singing at the top of our lungs, dancing like crazy, cheering friends on in skits, meeting new girls, lovin on them. but it can also be really challenging-getting the courage to go talk to the girls who are alone, starting convos when there's an awkward silence, or even going out of your comfort zone-being vulnerable and getting rejected. it's tough, but i've definitely been learning that what's there to lose? i've been blessed with the opportunity to hang out with these girls- i should try to make the most of it however i can-even if that means being rejected, standing with the loners. loving them and showing them christ is what we want. that's it. we're not leading them to ourselves or to get them to like us. we want them to learn about jesus, the guys who loves us more than we could ever imagine, who gave his life for us so that we could have an intimate relationship with the lord, who forgives our sins. that's who we want them to know and fall in love with.

with all that being sad, i sometimes still do get discouraged when i'm leading. i have those nights after club where i'm disappointed in myself-thinking i missed opportunites, could have loved better, or didn't say the right thing. but i also am learning that it's not me leading these kids to the lord, it's the lord in me leading them. and he's guiding me, he's using me, he's speaking through me to the hearts of these kids. it's all him. the glory goes to him. always.

 the thoughts of him having the plans for me of leading these girls reassures me/gives me confidence in him that he will lead me while i've been given the opportunity to lead the girls. like i said it's still something i'm learning and i still do get caught up in the "what I am doing" instead of what HE is doing in/through me. it's cool to think that i dont have to worry-he already has the plans for me figured out. every single day. and this doesn't just apply to wyldlife. whether you're in school, at a sporting game, whatever it may be-why not go to talk to the people who are standing by themselves? start up a conversation with someone you dont know. asks questions. be vulnerable. love on them :)