Friday, March 23, 2012
you can only hold back the river so long.
i hate being sick. luckily it doesn't happen to often but when it does it's the worst. i felt fine tuesday night and then woke up wednesday morning and it just went down hill from there...although being sick is no fun, the real bummer was that i was supposed to give the wyldlife talk and instead of going to school, coming home and practicing before club, i ended up staying home from school sleeping all day... and couldn't go to wyldlife/give the talk. it was awful, i felt like i was letting the other leaders down and adding even more stress to club. they were of course very understanding and encouraging, man they're awesome, and i'm so blessed to be able to lead with them. so they adjusted to club without me and went on with the night. eric ended up giving the talk and although i wasn't down there for it, i'm sure it was awesome (as always). as bummed as i was about not giving the talk, it was cool to realize that before i had even gotten sick the Lord knew i wasn't going to give the talk. it wasn't my time, who knows maybe something eric said was just what one of those middle schoolers needed to hear. but whatever the reason, i wasnt supposed to give the talk. something i learned/and am still learning from prayer overnight is how important it is to remain in the Lord. being in constant communication with Him. because without that we will be doubtful, worried, stressed, overwhelmed, distracted. (kind of like how i was feeling wednesday morning when i wasn't sure if i could give the talk that night and definitely scared of breaking that news to the other leaders). but after praying about it a sense of comfort and relief came, and when i told the other leaders they were so supportive and encouraging. when i remain i'm able to see the bigger picture, to realize that i am not and can not being doing this alone (even when sometimes my stubborness thinks that i can) so to remind myself of this i've decided to start reading John 15:1-17 everyday.to be reminded that if i am not relying, remaining, and communicating with Him i'm not gonna be going anywhere but that when i do remain, that is when the fruit comes.
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Hi there, cute Caroline.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, congrats on making Titan 12! We know what a fabulous honor that is, and they couldn't have chosen a better person!
Second, I'm so sorry you got sick and missed sharing your devo. That's a bummer and I know how disappointed you were. But you're right - nothing takes God by surprise, and He knew you'd need to rest. You'll have another opportunity to share that, so keep it rolling in your head.
Third, since you like the passage from John about abiding, I'm going to try to find something for you. I'd give you my copy except that I've read it a gajillion times and it's so marked up you can't read it.
Keep abiding. Your fruit is beautiful :)
thank you so much mrs. sitlwell! that really means a lot! you are so sweet. and i would love to read anything you suggest but dont go through too much trouble if you can't find it! thank you again, see you soon :)
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